Being an advocate is one of the most giving and selfless things you can do to help your loved one. From our years of experience, we have found advocates are critically important to both doctors and patients. It is wonderful when patients have a family member or friend who can take on this role. It is not an easy job and requires one to be on their toes and stay level-headed. It is very important that advocates understand their responsibilities and are ready for this position. Being an advocate often includes accompanying a loved one to medical appointments, monitoring medications, scheduling appointments, overseeing nutrition, planning exercise, and helping with overall well being.
There is no rule for who steps up to be an advocate. It is often a patient’s significant other, but can be their child, relative, neighbor or very close friend. While you might find classes and information on advocacy, most of learning how to be an advocate happens on the job. It can be very difficult to suddenly become the person who needs to remind their loved one to eat, drink, walk or take medicine. It helps when this is done with compassion and love.
As an advocate, it is very important that you communicate with the medical team and take the stress off of your loved one. Even scheduling appointments can be very difficult and emotionally stressful for a patient undergoing chemotherapy and battling mesothelioma. As an advocate, fight for your loved one calmly and with the strength that your loved one does not have at the moment. It is important that you be your loved one’s rock throughout this often stressful, confusing, and chaotic. Although your heart might be breaking, by remaining focused and calm you are performing an invaluable role. It is one of the most sincere and important things you can do for your loved one.
We have seen the truly inspiring relationships between patients and their advocates. Although this is a very difficult time, you can become very close, create cherished memories, and help your loved one feel comforted and loved.